1. Choosing inner peace over reacting. 2. Walking away from drama. 3. Being your own validation. 4. Trusting yourself. 5. Honouring your needs. 6. Recognising unhealthy patterns. 7. Falling back in love with your life.
It’s time to get clear about who you are. It’s time to get clear about what you want. It’s time to get clear about what you need. It’s time to get clear about what you value. It’s time to get clear about what you desire. It’s time to get clear about what you cherish. It’s time to get clear about what you deserve.
Everyone doesn’t need access to you. Some people are draining and they don’t even know it. You’re allowed to say NO. You’re allowed to not answer calls. You’re allowed to break plans. And if you need to save yourself, do it.
Recovery is a process-no matter what it is you’re overcoming. No one is better or greater for recovering faster. It’s not a race. You need to go at your own pace, even if that is pace is slow. There will be days when you feel like giving up-don’t. There will be days when you’re at risk of relapsing-don’t. So long as you set your own pace and never go backward in your recovery, you’re making tremendous progress, and that’s all that matters. So be proud of what you’ve accomplished for yourself.
Don’t compare your recovery process to others. Remember that each of us heals physically, mentally, and emotionally at the pace that’s right for ourselves. Give yourself the time you need and deserve.
You need to ignore what everyone else is doing and achieving. Your life is about breaking your own limits and outgrowing yourself to live your best life. You are not in competition with anyone else. Plan to outdo your past, not other people.
I hope you choose patience. Even when you are overwhelmed by unknowns. When someone cannot give you answers, when you begin to wonder why you’re here, when you simply want to give up: BE PATIENT. Some people are truly worth the wait.
I hope you choose love. Even when it would be easier to hate. When someone stirs white hot rage within you, when they insult you, when they question your worth: BE LOVING. Some people need your love more than you do. (Not my words.)
Tomorrow is not promised. Not a single second or minute is PROMISED. So, live for today. Keep the promises you make. Take action on the things you desire and need. Remind those that matter to you that they are loved and you are grateful for them. Never leave someone you care about on negative terms. Give more than you take. Make the calls you’ve been telling yourself you’ll do ‘tomorrow’. Let the small shit go. Let equations with inconsistent people fall. Never go to bed angry. We will all die one day, so learn to live each day with the promise to yourself that it’ll be better than yesterday.
(This video got nothing to do with the post above. I can’t believe that a group of people still deny global warming & climate change. Shared this tiny video because i wanted to share this issue.)
1: Spend time alone. 2: Acknowledge your efforts and accomplishments. 3: Validate your feelings. 4: Speak to yourself with respect. 5: Identify and fulfill your needs. 6: Forgive yourself. 7: Be honest. 8: Accept yourself for who you are. 9: Set and keep boundaries. 10: Stop comparing yourself to others.
For example; suppose you want a great body. You just need to wake up early for a run, eat right, do push-ups, do pull-ups, do squats, sleep in time, done. You have to do this every single day of your life. That’s so SIMPLE. But, how EASY is that, you have to answer me!?
Your life will pass one way or another. The events that will unfold are the events that will unfold. You will meet amazing people who you are meant to. You will find the opportunities you need. You will desire what you want. The choice is not what you experience, but how. How is everything. How is golden. How closes doors and it opens them. How creates something out of nothing.
It is not the years we live, but HOW we live them. It is not who we cross paths with, but how we love them & appreciate them. It is not what we are given or not, but how we take what’s in front of us and turn it into all we ever needed it to be. It is how we experience life, day in and day out, in the quietest moments and biggest ways. The HOW is the way.
1. Make peace with your past so it won’t screw up the present. 2. What others think of you is none of your business. 3. Time heals almost everything, give it time. 4. Don’t compare your life to others and don’t judge them. You have no idea what their journey is all about. 5. Stop thinking too much, it’s alright not to know the answers. Answers will come to you when you least expect it. 6. No one is in charge of your happiness, except you. 7. Smile. You don’t own all the problems in the world. 8. Understand the difference between WANT & NEED. Follow what you feel.
Keep looking. Not for a person, but for your passion, your love, your courage, your goals, your dreams, your happiness, yourself. Keep looking. Explore your life before you explore another. Know your worth, know yourself. Only then, you will know what you need over what you want. You need yourself to become your own. Key to your future happy life is in your hands.
Life keeps leading us on journeys we would never go on if it were up to us. Don’t be afraid. Have faith. Find the lessons. Life is fun, let it be.
People never understand “what you want to do” is always connected to “what you need to do”.
Suppose i want to be an engineer, i need to study engineering. Suppose i want to a writer/musician/athlete, i need to learn & practice writing/music/sports. Suppose i want to get fit, i need to workout.
What you want to do doesn’t make any sense till you aren’t following what you need to do first. This is the major reason most people stay unhappy & blame others for their failures. This one tiny mindset change can drastically evolve your life in a year.
NEEDS FIRST, WANTS NEXT.
(This movie trailer got nothing to do with the post above. My first real full-time job was software developer before i switched to data analytics field. I know where we are heading with time, our world isn’t going bad as this trailer shows. But the way technology is advancing, who knows what’s coming after hundred years!! Anyways, there are no boundaries for imagination.)
I love people who aren’t afraid to be their own weird and wonderfully imperfect self. These people make people happy, these people are so rare and special. We need more people like this in the world, and that’s why you shouldn’t ever wish to be anybody but your weird and wonderfully imperfect self.
Few ways you can express how you feel towards someone;
1. I love you. 2. I need you. 3. I want you. 4. I want to be with you. 5. I don’t want to be without you. 6. I can’t live without you. 7. I miss you.
NEED, needs can be met somewhere else & being needy means being weak as well. LOVE, this word is highly misused by people & especially someone like me needs a year to trust after a year of healing. WANT is my favourite & number-3 is my pick out of all these 7. WANT is that animalistic desire inside. Which means i know i have few suitors/options, but who cares because it’s you and just you that i WANT for myself. In case you love someone, remind them constantly & consistently that YOU WANT THEM.
Last time someone said “I WANT YOU” to me was on my birthday. I haven’t replied that till now. Never rushed towards anyone. Never allowed anyone to rush towards me either. The simple reason is; “If someone is investing their time & energy on me, that person deserves a whole TAP”. I am that kind of a person who hides nothing. My only secrets are my bank account/credit card pin or my email/social media account passwords. And right now, i am still in that phase of healing i mentioned above.
Whenever i say “LIONESS” in my posts, it’s my appreciation to that person who understands where i am coming from & why. Appreciated for picking/dropping me at airport. Appreciated for taking me out to my favourite brunch. Appreciated for buying me a pair of white vans kicks after watching squid games. Appreciated for helping me with carwash. Appreciated for typing my thesis. Very few people come with a clean heart & no stupid outlandish expectations. So LIONESS, Like your favourite alphabet is T, my favourite word is “APPRECIATION”. Rest all are a LEO-LEO thing i guess.😜 Every relationship of your life is a major investment of time & energy. Take your sweet time, that says all about who’s who.
Neglect is abusive. Ignoring a person and not caring about who they are, what they want, what they need, is like telling them, they are not important, over and over again. Some narcissistic toxic people use NEGLECT to make you feel insignificant and unworthy.
No one knows what you need to do more than you do. Cry when you need to, It’s relieving. Laugh when you need to, It’s healing. Sit alone half an hour when you need to, It’s necessary. Surround yourself with random friends when you need to, It’s eye-opening. Especially listening to someone carefully is a dose of nectar to our eager mind & heart. Living by your needs is not easy, no one said it was. But a fact that you should always remember is this: “You are more worthy of being taken care of than anyone around you. And I don’t mean the superficial kind of care. I mean the care that your soul needs”.
Everyone around you is struggling somehow. Everyone around you is trying to reach a goal, a destination, or a dream. Just as you might not expose your worries to the world, no one else has to. Remember that you are a work in progress. You are not perfect & you are not expected to be PERFECT.
Do not allow the fear of falling to stop you from jumping. Do not allow the fear of responsibility to stop you from committing. Do not allow the fear of exposure to stop you from shining. (Not my words).
What brings you happiness? Is it more money, a fancy car, it’s easy to think that things like a better job, a bigger home or someone special can make you happier!?!
A lot of people believe that if they fulfill their desires, they would be satisfied having goals and working toward them as great. Which is completely true. Being a human we must cater to our desires & goals for our happiness. We live in a world which runs on material growth. But when your happiness depends solely on achievement, you’ll end up doing more harm than good instead of just focusing on getting your wants. It’s much easier to find happiness by ridding yourself of the things that aren’t serving you. Start this year by getting rid of people & things you don’t want. Before that understand what you need & what you want. It’s tough, but a lighter head and heart is just a start.
Sometimes I feel bit drained with too much of everything I created for myself within a short period of time. But my head & heart both light up when I get a call once in a month from my team saying “Bossman, next week we need your signature & presence”.
I have the audacity to say & do whatever I feel right for me while being TRUE to everyone I am connecting. Never felt the need to lie or deceive someone, never did that.
If I need/want you in my life, I know I am not strong enough to hurt you. If you feel hurt because of me, most probably I have stopped caring whatever you are & I don’t give a shit what you think of me. My TRUTH always stays intact & unchanged in all circumstances. Don’t count it like my ego, it’s my way of prioritizing myself & those who wanna see me smile.
Doesn’t matter what’s your state of mind right now, learn to face your truth & responsibilities. We need to move forward in life always, don’t lapse it.
One tiny tip; do something for your financial stability. That’s gonna lift you higher on a longer run. Progress is the only pattern of life. Don’t smash your growth by holding yourself back in any negativity.
If it’s not forever, it’s not LOVE. That’s how I see LOVE. And relationships can be hatched without misusing that four letter word. In case you are coming towards me, I will test the hell out of you & make you prove your want/need/desire/love towards me a million times. Then maybe I will call it quits if it’s not making me feel that positive vibe of togetherness. Bad will work, lie will not. Be you.
Friends think I am a tough nut to crack. Actually I am the smoothest emotional wreck. You can touch my core in the tiniest possible moment. Tricky part: I can sense body language & voice modulation changes, bit psychic you can say. One lie & you fuck your chances to be with me. Do everything right or wrong, I will support you & let you own me easily once you follow your Truth.
My LOVE story will rise from TRUST & abundance. I will enter a relationship someday I feel that exact same vibe of a equal me, equal respect I mean.