Tag: bitch

Valentines DAY.. How to!! FOR MY BROS..

Valentine’s Day is around the corner. Whether you wanna woo your boo, asking someone new out on a date or you are in a mood to get laid; take these tiny tips from your bro. A few lines of man-to-man talk.

1. Remove all deodorants from your closet today. Get a cologne/perfume, a good one looking at your budget (The best one I can suggest as it’s my all season good to go: DAVIDOFF COOL WATER). Before you meet her, a mild spray near back of your neck & earlobes. Don’t ask why!! Your girl deserves a well groomed person who values styling & smelling nice.

2. 4 days left for your date night, I mean 14th February night. Right after you wake up every single day from now, grind a big piece of ginger, add some warm water to it & drink it without thinking taste. Ginger is a natural thermogenic antioxidant & it helps to correct the amount of blood flow to overall body parts including your downstairs department. Now you know why.

3. Clean your bush & make sure to apply some extra virgin olive oil to stay away from unnecessary body odours. Get some nice boxer shorts as well.

4. Understand the importance of keeping it classy yet low-key while dressing up for special occasions. Wear a sleek wristwatch, dial not bigger than 42mm. Just for one day, ditch your sports shoes or Balenciaga Triple-S kinda moonwalkers.

This is a screenshot from my Instagram stories. I usually do this social service every year to some stupid friends.

Last tip: Own who you are for real. When you are talking to your partner or future-partner, make sure you lie/hide nothing. Be blunt about what you want from yourself & from the other side as well. A truthful person is hard to resist & people take no time to get intimidated. Tap OUT..💪👍

True me.. Tap-202..

Soon or sooner I am buying a bitch with tons of adore for my bedroom adventures, hell YES I wanna pump two babies inside her by 2022 or 2023.

Tap OUT..😜

Tap my thoughts.. 183..

Dumping a new bitch & another old high school mate till 2020. I don’t want to entertain such assholes who look for vegan food in KFC. Dorky punks!!

Tap my thoughts.. 173..

Her head & heart both are clean like a innocent baby, when your bitch wants to have crispy bacon & syrup for snacks while sipping Martini/Cocktail. Don’t miss a chance, MARRY HER.

True me.. Tap-193..

Jim Rohn says “YOU ARE AVERAGE OF YOUR FIVE CLOSEST FRIENDS”.

In that case, I am in a big dilemma. Coz now a days I have three closest friends & one bitch I wanna woo, still one person short. Ha Ha.

Tap OUT..😂

Dumb Demi: I need your Help!!

Whenever I say “my bitch”, only one person gets supremely excited because there is a “MY” in it. The bitch I am talking about is my saviour. I never needed her support, but she shown up & kicked my ass to move ahead quickly swiftly successfully towards happiness. I am talking about “my bestie bitch-Demi”.

Whenever we connect, her words are more like two grade-3 kids planning how to build a sand-castle near a beach. Though I am just 4.67billion times mature compared to her, I always end up joining that stupid idea. Friends ask me more about her, I answer this about who she is; “Clean heart, Clear mind, unaware of wtf is EGO & LIE, Dad’s credit card after spending own salary”. Whatever it may be, you are True & Yes I am buttering you little bit right now. Get me that 1800-supreme hoodie latest drop (Dark olive or Heather Grey Please). I will let you spank my butt twice in exchange.

Apart from all: you put me to the right place when I was collapsing to pieces. No thank you for being my bestie. But thank you in advance for that hoodie. If you aren’t able to fly, please ask me my new address to mail that shit.🤗😘

Yeah. That’s my BESTIE!!

You know who can screw each of my lines easy peasy. Demi, I want to tell you one thing from the bottom of my heart: “sometimes I lose my shit & sometimes I lose my breath, while checking out your ass & attitude.” You are a weirdly ridiculous pain to me & I can’t do anything about that. We always come back to each other where we left. No matter how big of a bitch you are, I adore/appreciate you for being bestie to this asshole named Tap.😘

True me.. Tap-90..

Life in short:
Set goals. Smash it. Make money, make more of it. Shop. Travel. Eat. Save. Invest. Buy a house. Woo an angel/bitch as good/bad as you, fall in love till emotions lurk both, ram her each moment till your name echos back to your ear, try to be little gentle at some point & make that house a home together.

Tap OUT..😜

True me.. Tap-34..

It bums my head when people refuse to change their ways of leading a deceptive life full of same indecisiveness. We all are entitled/allowed to commit some mistakes. But when someone does the same mistake 100 times, just remember that person is toxic & they either need some God’s intervention or a medical treatment to reach a calmer water. Till that time you make sure to get the best out of you & leave that toxicity behind.

My best life is to focus on my finances, travel & some nice hang/bang around with buddy bitches 😜. Figure out yours & never stay stuck in a cycle/pattern. Some people need to prove their worth to be around you. Let them reach there with their own efforts. We all deserve HAPPINESS & it should be timeless. Genuine people gain momentum towards a positive life with COMMUNICATION.

Be UNFUCKWITHABLE.. Tap OUT..😘

When yo BITCH is pure sas!!

Ha Ha. I can’t ask for more. Life is good when vibe is good. When a true person sparks a charm which makes you smile, that banter is raunchy af. Not LOVE, it’s your company which makes me feel grounded & pampered.

Bad true people are welcome, and a big FUCK YOU to good liers.